Hi, my name is Goli and I'm a life-long people-pleaser.
I have a feeling a lot of you are too. Because we're trained from childhood to just do what we're told and not make waves.And while I used to understand that this tendency made me overly agreeable, overly apologetic (hello, women?), and obsessed with making sure everyone liked me, I didn't realize how much it actually kept me stuck in my career.
Tendencies like overachieving or perfectionism are just symptoms of the need to be liked. We think that if we just tick off the next accomplishment, like getting the promotion or making partner, or we turn in the perfect work product, then everyone will be happy and, in turn, we'll be happy.
But I don't have to tell you that it doesn't work that way.
We just move the goalposts. Maybe excelling at the next thing will finally make it all worthwhile. (Spoiler alert: it won't).
So we stay in a career we hate because the idea of other people's opinions weighs heavier than our own happiness.
How will I explain that I don't want to do this? Who am I if I'm not [insert "successful" profession here]?
This week on the podcast, I dive all into the nature of our people-pleasing and how to start climbing your way out of this suffocating tendency. Follow along for more: